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:icondannius: More from Dannius


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Submitted on
June 19, 2004
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I sink to the depths of my own demise

I seek to destroy that which i want most

I long to be part of what i never had

I scream and fall below the surface


If i was me, i would never grow so angry, if i was me, i would never feed the hate. If i were you, i would stand and watch, if i were you, i would never have let me go. My tears stain my hands and blind my vision, pull the trigger, the soul is left behind and the shell cracks open.

The deeper i go, the further i climb, from my own despair, a never ending pit of agony and pain. Everyone hurts, everyone sees, everyone feels, but everyone is not me.

Keep me swimming.....

I scream and fall below the surface.....

If i was me, i wouldnt to what im from, If i was me, i wouldnt write black with white. If i were that, i wouldnt be it, If i were her, i wouldnt be him. My mind stretches to fill the deepest gaps of my life, the answer eluding within a maze of events, happenings, it hurts.

The cloud of hate surrounds me now, choking me, the air drains from my lungs as it does my life. Struggling is beyong ability, alone i die, within myself, within my feelings.

Keep me swimming.....

I scream and fall below the surface.....

Screaming, below the waterline
Below The Waterline
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:icondragonkeeper333:
DragonKeeper333 Oct 14, 2004  Professional General Artist
crapola! well not in a bad way. imean................let me try that again...................FANTASTIC! wow that is some pretty cool shadow effects. i like that alot! i love the illuminating affects and its sexy at the same time. nice job. you have some pretty random art though but its all good.
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:iconhumors:
Emotional as it is, love it.
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:iconangelfthr2:
i don't think any further explanation is necessary--i get it--we all go through periods in our lives when for some reason you feel like you are drowning--depression sometimes feels this way-a poem needs no explanation-it is a like a beautiful painting-the textures and colors give it life--and you don't critique the content--just how the piece makes you feel or how the feelings relate to your life- i like this piece and love the metaphor--what i don't like are devs who get all self-righteous when they critique others work--methidox's comments were not constructive just destructive--i would pay no heed to what a 17 year old says--this is an awesome poem and i'm going to fav it!!! :worship:
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:iconcedrada:
"pull the trigger, the soul is left behind and the shell cracks open."
I love this lline, I can see it clearly in my head.
I love this piece, i may have to :+fave: it. There is so much anger and depression and hate in it.


If i were her, i would never have let you go.
:hug:
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:icondomainjewel:
Wow... I think this is a bit deep for me... The photo is cool how it is only a few highlighted parts. It sounds a bit like an Evanescance song. Sorry that's the best I can do :)
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:iconzalisa:
I really like the last line. You did a great job of making the reader part of the poem and forcing them to understand what you are feeling. :clap:
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:iconsjostrand:
Sjostrand Jun 20, 2004  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Very good and expressive! I especially like the end and the shot looks great. :)
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:iconangry-wetback:
Wow. All I can say is.. WOW!!! I'm looking for words to describe this piece, but I'm stuck. It's amazing.
Reply
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